For three weeks now, I’ve been toggling back and forth with a post about summer style.
Even the first style “to-do” chosen and broken down.
BUT THEN I STOPPED.
I found myself staring at the cursor steadily blinking on the screen, as if urging me to “Come on already…”.
Yet, I had nothing to give on the subject.
How could I not have anything to say about style, when that’s who I am? That’s what this is supposed to be all about. Right?!
IT COULD ALL BE SO SIMPLE…
While speaking with a close friend about affirmations and managing our thoughts and words I realized that I’ve denied myself the comfort of me for a very long time. It’s been a constant battle of accepting who I am versus who I was.
…AND WE BOTH END UP WITH SCARS.
Rejection, disappointments, and heartaches, hasn’t made me special…it’s made me human. It shows my resilience as a woman…and my value. Yet, past scars are still raised. Impatience has delayed their healing and the battle has seemed to have no end.
TELL ME WHO I HAVE TO BE…
By not recognizing my gift for what it is – a divine purpose – I’ve found myself doubting each step of my creative journey. Focusing heavily on recognition and applause of others, instead of celebrating the light that is ME.
SEE, NO ONE LOVES YOU MORE THAN ME, AND NO ONE EVER WILL.
I’m a woman of faith. There is no particular religion that I attest to, but I believe that God is real. Whenever I’ve been faced with the work of realigning with my truth, He has consistently focused my attention in three specific ways: 1) scripture, 2) a person that I trust, and 3) music.
Scripture is always in my life in some way shape or form, but one scripture always signifies that my life is on the brink of a major reboot, Mark 11:23-24. It was nearly a week ago that it resurfaced repetitively on my social media timelines. Then, came the call with my friend. Two nights ago, when I sat back at this computer to finalize the “summer style” post, a familiar song popped into my head. The moment the lyrics parted my lips, I was overcome with emotion.
Since its release in 1998, Lauryn Hills’ “Ex-Factor” has been my go to track for my break-ups-to-make ups. I was all of 14 years old at the time of its release. Nowhere near the woman that I am today. So, when I sang the first verse this go round, it meant something entirely different…and inspired this post.
It could all be so simple
But you’d rather make it hard
Loving you is like a battle
And we both end up with scars
Tell me, who I have to be
To get some reciprocity
No one loves you more than me
And no one ever will
The words reflect an internal conversation. A reminder of where passion and love always begins. I may not be the first to find a deeper message in this song. My battle has clouded my understanding of my purpose. I’ve consistently felt disappointment in myself because of limits that I set upon myself based on what I felt would make others more receptive of my authenticity.
I am a writer that happens to love style among many other things. Writing is the art that God blessed me with. Style is a serious interest of mine, but it is not what this is all about. This is about inspiring others to be their authentic selves. This is about embracing your creative gift. This is about moving forward to love who’s been there through it all: YOU!
I challenge you to become familiar with the lyrics of this entire song (if you aren’t already) and sing it with your whole heart while staring in a mirror. It’s powerful. Every. Single. Word.
I’d love to hear if your perception changes. If not with this song, please share a song that you have found a more internal connection with.
I’m looking forward to talking with you!
With Love + Style,